Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Motherhood Truths

In the two years that I've been a mother, I can say that I have learned a few things. Probably, not as much as those with two kids or more or those who are mothers longer than I've been one but still, I hope some moms would learn a thing or two from my list.

You will feel guilty. Maybe not always but there will come a time when you leave your child at home to go have some "me" time and you'd hear that incriminating voice in your head asking, "How could you?". I heard that voice, more than a few times, when I badly needed some alone time or whenever me and hubby escape for a quick movie date. You don't have reason to feel bad. All moms need even a short amount of "away" time for us to recharge our energies. You'll have mommy burn out if you don't.

You will become unsociable. Most especially during those first few months after giving birth because you will be sleep-deprived caring for you newborn, very tired after doing all the household chores and quite frustrated for wanting a little romantic time with your husband which unfortunately never happens. Choosing sleep over a night out is called for and I'm sure your friends would understand that.

You will be selfless. Once you become a mother, instinctively, you will put your kid's needs over your own. When I was single, all I could think of every payday is that new bag that I've been eyeing for so long or those killer pair of high heels that (though I'm sure my feet would really hurt wearing them) I've been dying to buy. Now, all I could think of every payday is my son's milk and diapers. I can't even remember the last time I bought myself a new pair of jeans or a good-fitting blouse because every time I look at the price tag of the things I've been meaning to buy for myself, I am reminded that one blouse costs as much as a week's worth of Johan's milk. So, I put off buying myself some new things.

Your patience will be tested. Again and again. My toddler sometimes seems to confuse the word "No!" to "Go!". Whenever I tell him to stop, he tends to do the opposite thing and ignore me. Remember that my son just turned two years old, imagine how it'll be when he turns a year older. Ohh, I am so prepping myself for that magical word, "Why?".

You will be judged.  Be it by other moms or non-moms. You parenting skills will be on constant scrutiny and you'll continuously receive unsolicited advice on how it is best to raise your own kid. My own unsolicited advice: be polite, be firm and move on. Unless you're going to actually do what you were advised to do, it is best to bite your tongue, maybe just say "Thanks, but no thanks" then walk away. It is for everybody's peace of mind, believe me.

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